Falling in love with you.

Falling in love with you was like waking up after a long nap. I didn't realize that I had almost forgotten how good it felt to be well rested again, until you showed me. I missed out on a lot, and you helped me catch up. I tried so hard to break my fall, but when I saw you, I saw, too, that this kind of falling didn't hurt at all.

Staying in love with you was never a choice I had to make. Each new day dawned, and I just knew, like I knew for sure the color of the sky, like I knew for sure the way the corners of your eyes crinkled when you smiled, that I was right where I was supposed to be. I belonged there, as much as the leaves belonged to the trees, and the trees to the Earth. I never had to question myself if I was happy. There was no place in my mind for second guessing, however difficult it was to keep you. However far from my my grasp you slipped.

Falling out of love with you was the very one thing I never imagined I would do. There were times when I told myself, "I can't", but I did it, and I had. I looked back on everything we have been through and wonder where we went wrong. I rummaged through my memories of you to figure out exactly when things started spinning out of control, but I could not find anything that would answer my questions.

Staying out of love with you is a decision I have to make every single day. Sometimes, when I'm feeling charitable, I set myself free and let my desires flick through pictures of you. I let myself be carried away to the time when it felt like the world was made of two people, you and I, but only to a certain extent. Some days, I almost feel like I've done it, I've crossed the very thin line that separates my happiness from you. Some days are better than others.

Isn't it sad now, how you can't even look at me and say you're sorry? Isn't it terrible how I look you straight in the eyes and say I'm okay?