Traffic Makes Me Feel Like I'm Part Of Something Bigger.

It's kind of obvious that I have just seen Step Up 3. Awesome movie. It made me cry cause even it showed that best friends drift apart sometimes. And Moose's best friend's name was Camille.

Nothing makes sense. Even the news from the TV echoes that the President had hotdogs for lunch in America. Rappers rap about poverty and bystanders and the problems of the community, but they never give us any possible solution to the problems, just like I am doing now. I keep blogging about the things that tie me down but I can never seem to have the courage pr will to let them go.

I know, there's more to life than rainbows and sunsets and watercolor painted skies, but those are the things that I live for. I keep trying to look at the bright side, but where is it, anyway? I'm blind. Maybe when the storm ends, we will both be standing at the edge, holding the stars in the palm of our hands, but what difference will it make, really? Will there still be you and me, board game nights, Anne Hathaway themed movie marathons? Will we still be doing each other's nails, laughing until our stomachs hurt? Will you still be making me giggle while I'm drinking Coke just so you'd see me spit it out of my nose?

I do worry about all the wrong things, don't I? But sometimes, you must tell me when something's wrong, because I can't go on guessing... It's hard to fumble in the dark when there is not even a tiny spark of light. How will I know what hurts you? You never tell me.

You're so distant now, and it's killing me cause I'm doing all I can... I am probably making a big fool of myself, but it's fine. I can't lose you, although I know you'd say I already have. What changed? We were so excited, we were so sure about our future. Do you now imagine your future without me? Please don't answer.

I think we are both too proud to admit our mistakes. Maybe we have something to learn from this but whatever that something is, I don't need it, okay? I don't. Take everything you want from me. Just please, please stop kicking me out of your life.

I love you.