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Sunday, May 23, 2010

Truth Was Injected In The Cliche



When you love someone as much as I love Alice, it wouldn't matter if she's causing you pain. It wouldn't matter if you know you're waiting for nothing. When you really love someone, Edward, you'll wait. Even if it takes forever.
 -Jasper Whitlock in The Day You Said Goodnight (FF)
I've just finished writing this chapter for my fanfiction, and I initially thought I was making Jasper too sappy or too much like a loser, but then I realized the truth in his words (that I invented).

It may sound like a cliche, like it came out of a movie character's lips, but that's reality. If you really love someone, you'd be willing to wait for them, even if it means pushing your own happiness aside, you would, just so you could cater to the wishes of the person you love.

Waiting, I know, is not one of my talents. When God showered the world with patience, I was hiding under a roof, so nothing rubbed off on me. You could ask anyone about my patience, and their answer, I'm pretty sure, would be that it is non-existent.

This is why the very minute I finished typing that line, I confronted myself: if I was ever put in the same situation, would I have said the same thing? Truth is, I don't know. I don't know if I would be patient enough to wait for love with no assurance. I've always been impulsive, jumping and falling without knowing what's waiting down below has never been a problem to me. I am a risk taker, but when that risk involves possible emotional pain, I back out.

Funny how it seems, a strog girl like me who could endure endless (no, just kidding) physical pain would chicken out when it comes to love. I am well aware that love itself is a risk, but I have the tendency to be depressed for days just because of one flicker of emotional pain. Maybe that's why none of my past relationships worked. I like being committed and having someone there, but as soon as insecurity strikes, I quit.

I wish I could change myself, but as much as I want to, I wouldn't. Maybe this would sound selfish, but doesn't it feel great to have someone who loves you for exactly who you are?

For once, I have waited, and I was right.

There's someone in this world who's looking for me--for the girl that is me exactly. No conditions, no additions, no subtractions. Just the plain old little me. And that, I could say, is totally worth the wait.

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