This post was written last April 28,2010 in my personal journal. I'm posting this here for future reading purposes,just that. I do not mean to offend anyone.
Have you heard of the word "virtue"? This is what I want to ask a girl right now...
Today,I woke up to another morning in a hot weather,like you would always assume if you live in the Philippines. My laptop sits on my study desk, unused for weeks now,I honestly lost count. My cellphone ran out of prepaid credits last night,so I can't sign in on Twitter,but because of my awesome cellphone skills, I can see what my friends are tweeting about.
Because I miss V (we haven't been able to talk for two days now),I checked her profile first,and that was when I saw it. Only one word came boldly in my mind: betrayal.
I wouldn't ponder on what I have read. I could only say one thing about it: you really cannot count on anyone fully,besides yourself.
This is why I hate being too attached to people. You expect to have someone to lean on to when everything else is falling apart, and then they'd fail you. When you nee comfort and love, they'd laugh at you. Or worse, in V's case, they get on the side of the people who live to hurt you. to think she was her best friend...this had me asking, does this girl know what she's doing?
Friendship. I believe it is even more important than romance. I don't know why some people don't understand that I ave met two of my best friends online.. Some say "get a life", now, let me ask: is it I who needs to get a life? I, whom she met online, oceans away, but is more than willing to risk my life in saving her from all this pain? You know what, if people with lives do what you are doing, then, no, thanks, but I don't intend to get one, and never will I.
The real meaning of camaraderie and sisterhood is just like love. It has no meaning at all. It's just a word, until you find some people, the right ones, who would help you understand what it is. no matter how hard we all try, there would never be an exa ct word to define friendship, except friendship itself.
One day, we will all bow down in surrender to life, and everything we've done, good or bad,will flash before our eyes. When I am tempted to do bad to people who hurt me,I repeat that to myself. I want my whole life to be worth the watch once it comes to an end, so slowly,I'm learning to give love to everyone,even to my enemies.
As for V whose life pretty much feels like hell right now, I'm here. I know she knows that she'll always have a friend, a thousand or more miles away. Call us crazy, pathetic losers- I don't care. It takes a little brain to understand that the oceans around the world are not deep enough to stop people from different places to find each other. And it takes a little heart to give encouragement and support friendships that form overseas. Just a little understanding... If you don't...you're making it clear to me that you do not have even just a little brain,nor a little heart.
Sometimes, I wish I live inside a snowglobe. Someone said that would be lonely, but for me, it's all I'd ever hope for. In a snow globe, three bears are holding a cake, showered with rains of glitters and beams of different colors of light, and they are happy. A snowglobe is a mighty small place,but would you blame me? Who needs a big place if it is full of empty promises and mockery? Who need so many people in their lives,when all you want to be with is already with you?
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