I just feel like I'm the loneliest girl today. *sigh* I don't want to bore you with my stories about days like this, but what else can I do? I need to blog to get this all off my head if only for a good ten minutes or so.
First of all, I really miss you, Louise and Vicky. You know, we keep denying to ourselves the fact that we have somehow grown apart... But it's not hard to see that we have. Or maybe it's just me that grew apart from the both of you. Well, whatever, really. Either way, we're not as bonded as we used to be. We used to be so eager to talk. I don't know what happened, but whatever it is, I love you. I do. And every single minute, it hurts to think that maybe I'll only be with you in dreams. I live in the Philippines, but part of my home, you bring with you wherever you are.
I miss Rani, too. Our random Twitter conversations with Leslie always pick me up. She's busy with studies though, so I totally understand that. I'm looking forward to talking to her again soon.
And then there's this uneasy feeling. I feel sick. They say I might have chicken pox any minute now, and I'm really scared because pain is the greatest of my fears. School's approaching, and how will I go to school if I'm sick? I don't want to be absent on our first week, cause then when I'm able to attend on the second week, everyone is already friends and I'd be left out like some kind of a freak.
I want to skip the next five years of my life, to be honest. I just want to fast forward and see what I'd be like after all these years. I want to have a regular job already. I want to go out of the country and see if the rain is just as chilly there as it is here. Mundane things like these keep me going. Sometimes, I feel like stopping everything altogether and just don't move, but somehow I keep pushing through. For reasons even reason can't find.
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